A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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