okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
