I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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