drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
