another moral hangover. fuck.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
