So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
