ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
