Small penises have feelings too.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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