Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
