i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
