I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
