They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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