im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
