At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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