hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
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