You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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