saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
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