i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
