question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
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