yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
