I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
