I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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