he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
