chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
