i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
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