i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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