I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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