dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
