She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
