I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
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