A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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