somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
