In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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