I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
