Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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