"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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