I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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