Your tits are I can't wait for
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
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