Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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