Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize