at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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