Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
