Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
