if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
