TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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