You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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