For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
