i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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