I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize