he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
