Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize