does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
